I've had the same email address for 5 years now, and somewhere in that time I managed to become a target for spam email, but not just any spam--porn spam. It really sucked at first because I would get all excited about having 31 new messages in my inbox, but when I actually looked at the list of senders they were obviously not from anyone I knew. A few of these emails are too funny not to share.
Subject: My boyfriend's putz keeps slipping out.
Body: Girls always giggled at me and even bucks did in the national WC! Well, now I whoop at them, because I took M_E GA D IK for 7 months and now my penis is dreadfully largest than usual.
Subject: My boyfriend's tool is too big for my mouth.
Body: Ladies always laughed at me and even bucks did in the federal bathroom! Well, now I whizgiggle at them, because I took Mega. Dik for 6 months and now my prick is badly longer than civil.
Subject: When I tried to give him oral sex, I practically choked. How do I do it without gagging? Please help!
Body: Chicks always whooped at me and even chaps did in the civil WC! Well, now I sriek at them, because I took Mega. Dik for 7 months and now my tool is dreadfully weightier than national.
Subject: Thank you, your request completed, one of our sexy girl wants to meet you.
Body: Local girls who like to have fun are waiting for you. These girls came to find a fuck buddy. Someone who is ready for a good fuck with no strings attached. Are you that person? Visit us!
Subject: I just started dating a guy I like, but his putz is on the small side and doesn't really satisfy me.
Body: Boytoys always hee-hawed at me and even chaps did in the unrestricted john! Well, now I smil at them, because I took M eg ad ik for 4 months and now my prick is very much bigger than civil.
WTF!? I don't know about you, but they haven't tempted me to buy any Megadik to make my putz dreadfully larger, and I'm most certainly not providing advice on how to give a good blow job. In fact, I'm more inclined to wash out their mouths with soap for using such horrible grammar.