Thursday, January 15, 2009

2008 Resolution Review

It's funny that I was ready to throw my failed 2007 resolutions under the bus long before the year was over but now that I've actually done a fairly decent job with my 2008 resolutions I'm procrastinating. And I don't know that I'm avoiding the resolutions so much as I don't know what to say exactly. 2008 was actually a very, very good year to me for so many reasons and... oh, that's it! I still don't know how to write about anything in a positive light. I've had way too much practice writing about how much I dislike something or how unhappy I am that when it comes to being satisfied I'm at a loss for words.

So I think I'll just get right to the point and see where that takes me.

1. Dedicate 30 minutes to my appearance each morning.
30 minutes? Not exactly, but I do dedicate time for primping each morning so that when I walk into the office I look like a 20-something professional in a business casual environment as opposed to a co-worker's daughter on Bring Your Child to Work Day. My hair is usually styled, I wear as much makeup as I'm comfortable wearing, and I stopped wearing those jeans with the torn bottoms.

2. Get at least 7 hours of sleep every weeknight.
I actually get 8 hours of sleep. I wake up every morning at 6:00 and workout for an hour. Most of the time, I can't function after 10:00PM anyway.

3. Write on a semi-regular basis.
Now that's funny. I like to write, I really do, but I am having the toughest time a) finding the time, and b) finding my niche. Like I mentioned before, you can't keep me away from the keyboard when I'm feeling down in the dumps, but when I'm content I'm all, "Hmm, I don't know what to say." I should still find time to write on a regular basis. After all, what's the point of keeping a blog if it sits quietly for all but 5 days of the month?

4. Walk the dogs every day (weather permitting).
Done. It's just unfortunate that the weather has not been permitting recently. Jon and I are pulling our hair out while dealing with 2 very restless dogs and sidewalks covered in snow that comes up to their chests. But before the snow and sub-zero wind chills blew in our night walks became so routine we had names for them: The Short Walk (around the block), The Short+ Walk (around the block and threw the park), and The Long Walk (weaving in and out of the multiple cal-de-sacs in our neighborhood). Walking the dogs with Jon each night felt so natural and comforting. It was a chance for us to talk without interruptions. It was a time for us to unwind and reclaim our lives after long days at work. I can't wait for the winter to end so we can resume our ritual. Not just for us, but also because I haven't found a better way to let the dogs get rid of all of this energy.

5. Read 40 books by December 31, 2008.
I stopped keeping track sometime in February, and I highly doubt I made it to 40 books. I think it was more like 20, again. I did get a good start for 2009 though--3 books so far.

6. Perfect the art of time management.

You know what I learned in 2008? I learned that I can't do everything and I learned that I had to be okay with that. I finally managed to convince myself that no one is perfect and I can't expect myself to be either. I learned that I needed to slow down, stop worrying about what I wasn't getting done, and start enjoying life with my husband and my dogs. No matter how much time I spend scrubbing and laundering and organizing there will always be something else, and while I do take time out to keep our home livable, I stopped obsessing about it and started spending more time doing the things that I want to do. Life is too short to waste so much energy nagging yourself the way I did.

7. Finish the Damn Desk already!
I'm sitting at right now. It's way too big for this room but it is one big, beautiful chunk of solid oak.

When I selected these resolutions last year I had no idea what was in store for me. They all seem so trivial compared to the 47 pounds I've lost and the peace I've found within myself. They don't compare to that day when I finally decided that I was never going to like myself until I did something about it and gradually turned myself into a person I don't mind being around 24-7. These resolutions were alright, but what 2008 really did for me was end an internal battle that had been going for almost a decade. It was a battle with myself to become a better person, inside and out. And I think I'm a better person.

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